


Tea Party Pretty Off

by GenuinelyTricked



Category: Steam Powered Giraffe
Genre: Gen, Tea Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-29
Updated: 2012-07-29
Packaged: 2017-11-10 23:10:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/471752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenuinelyTricked/pseuds/GenuinelyTricked
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rabbit and The Jon have a tea party. Spine is upset when he finds he wasn't invited.<br/>Things only get crazier from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The Spine was walking down one of the halls in the Walter mansion when something in one of the rooms caught his eye as he passed the doorway. He backed up and stared at the sight inside of the room.

Rabbit and the Jon were sitting on the floor next to a small table with a lacy tablecloth laid upon it. There was a teapot and a plate of cookies in the center, with a few teacups placed around the edge of the table. Both Rabbit and The Jon were wearing dresses over their normal outfits as they chatted and drank tea.

“What is going on here?” The Spine asked the two bots.

Rabbit looked at The Spine “We’re having a tea party The Spine.”

The Spine stepped into the room and stared at Rabbit. “I can see that. What I want to know is why I wasn’t invited.”

Rabbit’s head snapped towards The Jon. “The Jon!” He cried. “I thought I told you to send out the invi-vi-vitations!”  


The Jon merely shrugged and took another sip of tea.  


Rabbit patted the ground next to the table. “Well c-come on and join us then! We’ve got plen-plenty of tea left.”  


The Spine strode over to the table and sat down. He reached his arms towards the teapot to pour himself a cup when The Jon suddenly slapped his hands away.  


“You can’t have tea dressed like that!” The Jon yelled. “You must wear proper tea party attire!”  


“What?” The Spine looked at Rabbit and The Jon, an eyebrow raised.  


Rabbit nodded his head. “He’s right The Spine. Tea party rules state you can’t have tea if you aren’t dressed right.”  


“But I don’t have any tea party outfits.” The Spine said.  


“Don’t worry! I have some you could use!” The Jon stood and ran over to a little chest sitting over in the corner, the ribbon tied around his waist fluttering as he went. He opened the chest and started to rifle through it, occasionally throwing the random shoe, hat, or other odd clothing item behind him. Finally He stood and turned with a silver colored dress with black frilled trim in his hands.  


The Spine stared at it for a moment before looking back up at The Jon’s smiling face. “I’m not wearing that.” He said flatly.  


The Jon’s face fell and he looked like he might cry. “N-now The Spine.” Rabbit interjected. “If you wanna join this tea party you gotta follow the rules. Rules state you follow the dress code.”  


“But do I have to wear that?” He gestured at the dress in The Jon’s arms.  


Rabbit stood up and put an arm around The Jon. “He picked this dress special for you. You don’t wanna hurt his feelings by not wearing it? Besides,” he took the dress from The Jon and held it in front of the Spine. “I think it will look pretty on y-y-you.”  


The Spine’s mouth tightened into a flat line. After a moment of staring he grabbed the dress from Rabbit’s hands. “Fine.” He said as the other two robots smiled broadly. “I’ll put the dress on.”  


Giggling with glee, Rabbit and The Jon quickly sat back in their spots around the table as The Spine pulled the dress down over his head. He tugged gently at the hem to straighten it out over his suit and turned towards the table, his hands on his hips.  


“Is this good enough for the tea party?” He asked.  


The Jon stroked his chin thoughtfully. “Hmmmm, I don’t know.” He turned to Rabbit. “Do you think he’s pretty enough for this tea party?”  


Rabbit nodded. “I’d say he’s pretty enough.”  


“Pretty enough?” The Spine looked at the both incredulously. “I think I look darn pretty in this dress. In fact, I’d say I’m the prettiest bot there is.”  


It looked as though Rabbit was about to say something when a sudden crashing noise grabbed the three bots’ attention. Just to the side of the doorway, a large hole had been broken through the wall. The bots watched as the dust settled to see the fourth member of their band standing there, a scowl on her face.

“I’m the pretty one!” She growled.


	2. Chapter 2

“I’m the pretty one!” Upgrade growled.

The Spine stared Upgrade in the eye. “Oh yeah?” he said. “Because I have it on good authority that I make a darn pretty bot.”

“Under whose authority?” Upgrade asked him. Walking closer to jab at his chest with a metal finger.

The Spine gently pushed her out to arms length. “My own of course.”

Rabbit and the Jon sat watching the back and forth between the two bots with great interest. Suddenly Rabbit stood up and stepped in between them, pushing them away from each other. “N-now, now,” he stated. “Arguing about who is prettier will get us nowhere. Leeeeeet’s settle this like the 116 year olds we are.” The Spine and Upgrade looked down at the ground, thoroughly chastised. “And that of course means by fighting. PRETTY OFF! GO!”

Rabbit jumped back and resumed his seat next to The Jon and the two of them watched gleefully as both upgrade and The Spine stood off against each other, ready to try and out pretty the other.

“You wanna go first then big bot?” Upgrade taunted.

“I’ve always been told that it’s ladies first.” The Spine replied. “But since you offered so nicely.”

What ensued was  the most amazing and spectacular fight of pretty that anyone, living or otherwise, could ever have seen. Striking pose after pose, The Spine and Upgrade tried to out pretty each other. On and on they posed, each more pretty than the last. Glitter fell from the ceiling, flower petals drifted from the walls, Rabbit and The Jon ate popcorn.

For hours the two of them continued with their assault. They paused for a bit, staring each other down.

“Ready to give up yet?” The Spine asked his opponent, brushing some stray glitter off of the sleeve of his dress.

“Never.” Upgrade spat out, along with a few stray flower petals.

“Well then, I guess we’ll just have to fight to the death.” The Spine prepped for another pose.

“Bring it on!” Upgrade shouted.

“Bots! Bots please!” Michael Reed stood in the doorway. “Stop fighting. I’m sure we can settle whatever problem there is without having to fight.”

Rabbit and The Jon remained unfazed in their popcorn eating.

After a moment of silence, The Spine spoke up. “I put on a dress to join Rabbit and The Jon’s tea party when Upgrade said I wasn’t pretty enough.” He answered.

“LIAR!” Upgrade screamed at him.

“Wait,” Michael held up his hands. “This is about who is prettier?”

All four of the automatons nodded at him.

Michael gave a laugh. “I can solve this easily enough for you.”

“Y-y-you can?” Rabbit stuttered.

“Of course I can.” He nodded as the bots leaned in closer to hear his answer.

“The prettiest one,” He looked at them all. “Is me!”

Michael Reed struck a pose so beautiful, so gorgeous, that a heavenly light shone down upon him.  A flock of birds spawned at his feet and flew up into the sky, their feathers drifting lazily to the ground.

With a twitch and a slight fizzle, Upgrade and the Spine powered down. The light slowly faded as Michael Reed stopped posing. Rabbit and The Jon peeked out from behind their bucket of popcorn.

“Looks like you broke Upgrade and the Spine.” Rabbit commented after a moment.

Michael gave a frown. “Oops.” Wad his only comment.

The Jon Quickly stood up, turning his head as if he were listening for something. “I hear an Ice Cream Parade!” He shouted with glee.

“An Ice Cream Parade?” Rabbit clapped his hands together. “Oh boy let’s go!”

Rabbit grabbed Michael and tucked him under an arm and he and The Jon ran out of the room to find the ice cream parade, leaving Upgrade and The Spine in the room.


End file.
